Patience, the ultimate virtue in Macedonia

Falling behind already.

So its been about 2 weeks since I’ve written and there is a lot to share. I’ve been kinda lazy with updating because at the end of the day when I say I’m tired at 9:30pm so I can steal about 30 minutes of alone time before I really pass out, its hard for me to get the energy to type a decent entry. Sorry guys.

But, in the meantime, here are the major events that have happened, I’ll try to get a blurb in about them if possible:
-Hub day
-Field day
-A wedding party
-Many a coffee visit
-Mistakenly thinking my host grandfather died (this lasted only for a brief 5 minutes but I was pretty horrified for those 5 minutes)
-Another pack of pantyhose
-5hr+ play dates with neighboring relatives
-My birthday and a very interesting cake
-More ayvar making next door
-The Disko

oh, and the lady who lives above the store cut my hair when I went to visit. Lesson from that is, be careful what topics you choose to bring up to eliminate awkward silence when you have no command of the language(s).

The minor changes that have occurred are:
-No longer as interested in coffee visits
-More trips to Kumanovo because I’m bored with village life, much to the dismay of Razija
-Waiting for the end of the day so I can escape to my room and watch movies in English
-Growing annoyance at having my spare time sucked away from me in sneaky ways
-Finding that half understanding conversations around me is worse than not knowing anything at all

So I’ll try to give a brief run through of everything.
Hub day- I got to see the rest of the MAK 13 group in Kumanovo. Our location of choice was not the lovely Hotel Satelit this time, it broke my heart. Really. I forgot that there are at least 30 other newbies in this country and actually, Field day reminded me that there are about 100 americans roaming this country via the Peace corps overall. We had some great speakers at hub day who explained about 3000 years of history in 2 hour-long sessions. I got to see Rene (aka PeeHee) and that made my day. Unfortunately, there never seemed to be enough time to talk.

Field day- Field day is an event held in Skopje the capital that gets most, if not all, of the current volunteers together for silly games and a super fast meet n greet with the incoming trainees. I met about 50-60 people in 30 minutes. MAK 11s brought some stuff to sell since they are leaving and other items were up for a silent auction. The current volunteers brought food for a potluck but there were so many people that by the time I got through with the last bunch, there was only bread and potato chips. Whatevs, it was pretty fun. Ree and I had to scoot back to Romanovce after field day so that we could go to…

A Wedding Party- This was the most confusing/terrifying night in Macedonia yet. I got back from Skopje at 5pm, had 20 minutes to change and get as nice looking as possible before hopping in the car with Mitat and Razija to go to what I originally thought was a wedding. We drive through Cherkeze and keep going on the main road. Eventually we turn off onto a small half-paved road and it starts winding up the mountain. Beautiful view. We get out of the car and the women are sorted off towards the house and the men wander off somewhere else. We are at a house of Mitat’s family. Ree’s family was right behind us on the way there, so I could take comfort in having an American friend in the midst of the craziness. We wind through a crowd of old women in head scarfs and middle aged women in a variety of outfits: some are in sequined gowns, others are in pants or skirt suits, others are in everyday clothes. There is no way you can be over or underdressed for a party in this country. 80% of the event took place outside and it was quite cold in the mountains. After being jostled through the crowd to shake every hand possible and mutter my version of whatever was said to me, we all sat down to long tables and benches that reminded me of elementary school lunchroom. We had 5 courses of food in what seemed like a race to finish. Eat the soup, eat the salad, eat another kind of soup, eat the goulash, eat the bachlava- hurry! I always come in last. Im not sure how these women eat so fast.

Then, for no reason at all, every female there (the men were still off somewhere else anyway) was herded into two rooms. It seemed like 40-50 per room and the rooms were no bigger than my room in Philadelphia. Women were smushed together on the couch, then we sat on the floor pretty much on each other. They would smoke in turns too, by passing around 2 or 3 communal ashtrays. Women in dresses that looked like something you would wear to prom (and often not very flattering) would come in and out of the two rooms along a barely discernable path among the seated women. We also had to remove our shoes since we were inside, and Ree got her feet trample 3 times by the prom dress women who were wearing house slippers with heels. Ree decided to stick her feet under me for protection, so it was like sitting on ice at that point.

Soon after, my host mom decided its time for me to show off my newly acquired Albanian hora skillz. My playdates, Famije, Lila, Merale and Njazi, have taught me how to dance during our 5-7 hour play sessions. It finally paid off. I hora-ed amidst sporadic bursts of gunfire for an hour. Yes, gunfire. It is common for people to shoot off guns to celebrate weddings and such. So im dancing and I feel shells under my feet and they tell me, “No Scared” every time some other guy busts out a pistol and wastes some more ammo. At least they are Albanian, so they aren’t drunk. But still, not cool.

Ooh and the most confusing bit of all of this, is that the bride is not there. And why is that confusing? Oh, because there are 2-3 women walking around in white wedding dresses and serious pimped out makeup and hair! But there are not the expected bride, she’s not coming until the next day. What I’ve pieced together from some conversations with the English speakers around here is that women who recently got married wear their wedding dresses to these parties. But they haven’t explained why.
I’ve coffeed at about 10 new places since I last wrote. I went to the family of the guy who drives the kombi, now he waves to me all the time. I went to meet my playdates and now I end up there once a week for a ‘visit’ that never seems to end. I try to leave and then they tell me, no no stay for dinner we already told Razija. Sigh. I get very tired but they are sweet kids. They give me love notes with flowers taped on. They even gave me a birthday present today, a picture frame. I went to another house by Ferxhan’s school where I had a nice time talking with the 24 yr old daughter who spoke terrific English for never having left Macedonia. I went to Ree’s host father’s brother’s house and their 9 year old daughter taught me the days of the week and months of the year in Albanian. I went to our neighbor’s house and returned with a whole bag full of those terrible pears that I can’t escape. For a while, I thought that no one liked them and it was a secret game to try and pass them off on visitors and get rid of as many as possible. Vahide said that wasn’t the case, people actually like them (!). I went to Olga’s, the woman who lives above the closest store to my house. She reminds me of Oma, if Oma had ADD. She gave us about 10 different foods and drinks and than Razija thought it was odd that I didn’t want to eat dinner. We went to another house down the train tracks from Olga’s house which was awkward because it seemed like a funeral gathering but its not like I have the vocabulary to ask.

Mistaken Mortality- Mitat’s father is 80 and he stays in the other living room. He’s bed bound for the most part, they wheel him outside in the afternoon and they take him into the bathroom once a day, but that’s the most activity he seems to get these days. I think he’s still coherent most of the time. I often help vacuum the downstairs of the house, the two livingrooms and the room you first walk into. I finished the main livingroom/kitchen and the entrance room. I peeked my head into the other room to give the old man a “mire dite” before turning on the vacuum so I down scare him to death. I see him lying flat out on the couch, with the blanket draped over him as though he was dead. I’m thinking, ooh shiiiit. I go get Arjad and I didn’t want to say anything about dead so I point in. He shakes his head no, I don’t have to do that room now, so its cementing my idea that the old man is done. Maybe Arjad picked up on my confusion/mild panic, he went in and then kind of yelled at the old guy and I heard the grandfather respond and pull the blanket off his head. What a relief. The reasoning going through my head was purely selfish too, I was thinking, I hope I don’t have to witness a funeral yet.

Ok, ne problem.

Week one is over.

It went pretty fast and I have to say I’m not having a hard time adjusting or anything. My relationships with my host family members are getting richer all the time and I can’t wait to talk to them in Albanian. My hypothesis for why I am not freaking out is that I’m not particularly attached to any particular way of life. Shower without a curtain or showerhead holder? Ok no problem. Each strange food at every meal? No problem. Iron my underwear? Ok no problem. (Yes, they do that. There is decent reasoning too. Ironing serves as a way of sterilizing air dried clothes.) Being around people all the time? Surprisingly, no problem.

Im taking everything as it comes. Nothing has gotten me to the point of hysterics and I am skeptical that I will get there at all. Maybe once im on my own in skopje. I trust my host family implicitly, so much so that it does scare me a bit that I never once considered the fact that I am completely reliant on them.

I went to Cherkese today to meet Razija’s family. Razija was happy to drive the car. I had a great time with her family. And, I came home with the following in my bag: A Chicken Leg and a Package of Pantyhose. I didn’t eat lunch before we went to Cherkese because I had a feeling I would end up being offered about 10 different food items and about 5 glasses of regular Koka Kola. So we get there and round 1 is soda and Turkish coffee. Round 2 is soda refill, even though I declined. Round 3 is eat cookies. Round 4 is eat freshly cut melon (very yummy). Round 5 is eat chunks of strange, tart pears, compared to US pears, dipped in straight up sugar. Round 6 is someone pushing a bowl of seeds in my direction and me pretending not to see them. Round 7, more soda. Round 8- CHICKEN LEGS? That one came from left field. All of a sudden, I hear the word “Puhle” or however it is spelled and I know that means chicken. Then voila! Two Chicken legs are in front of me, on a left over foil bag from a snack mix. Well, I ate a leg. I don’t have enough Albanian skillz to politely decline and Razija tells me to eat it. No one else is eating anything so this is totally awwwwkwaard. After the one, I say thank you. Then, Albanian conversation directed at me, which amuses me since everyone knows I have no clue whats being said. The English speakers then tell me to take the other leg home! I try to say no, but that didn’t work any better than my other attempts at ‘jo’. So, I re-wrap the leftover leg of chicken in the snack mix foil and toss it in my bag.

On the way out, Razija’s sister in law shakes my hand, we exchange “diten e mir”s, and then she tucks a small box of knee high pantyhose into my hand. Why? I have no idea. I saw her and Razija’s mom pointing at my feet earlier, I was wearing black socks. Maybe girls don’t wear socks? I don’t know. But I now have some extra knee-hi pantyhose.

To get to Cherkese from Romanovce, you have to go through Kumanovo, if you are driving. There is a walking path to Cherkese, but it takes about 45 mins to walk and you need a big stick to ward off stray dogs. We roll back into Kumanovo after visiting and its shopping time. We pull up onto the sidewalk, that’s how you park your car in the Balkans, by the big market. As we walk toward the market, Razija checks the prices of peppers and tomatoes and eggplant from street vendors. I know what this means: Ayvar. Its ayvar time! Ayvar is this delicious spread that I have been eating for breakfast this week and I will definitely bring it back to the US. Razija cooks scrambled eggs and then mixes in ayvar. Yummms. After perusing the market, we walk back to the car and Razija buys her vegetables in bulk. I’ve never seen someone buy so much vegetables at once for non-commercial consumption. The peppers are now chilling out in the courtyard area drying.

After buying vegetables, we went to the stores to look for a huge pot/pan. Its gigantic. I’ll try to take a picture of it. I noticed that the store has all of the furnishings I’ve seen in our house or the houses of people we visit: the bedspread on my bed, the chai glasses, the bread dough plastic tub, the light fixtures. Everything.

We head over to the Musli Market and Razija charades to me that I can get anything I need with my money while we are here. We also meet a relative of Benson’s host family who works there AND speaks English. She helps me find tea bags, but there were no boxes of black tea. I wanted to make iced tea. I settled for mint tea.

I just got back tonight from another house for coffee/tea. The family had satellite tv and the father put BBC on. Well, can someone clue me in on what is going on in the global economy? I’m having the time of my life here in this fun little village but it looks like the rest of the world is falling apart financially. British banks are biting the dust? Are we totally screwed?

Kombi to Kumanovo

I shared the community 'bus' to town with my fellow trainees today. We got out at a market at a place that i thought i recognized- apparently i did not.

I took the scavenger hunt route (thats a real concept, we had a scavenger hunt of kumanovo back during orientation week and that was the only way i could find my destination. it was a scenic route to the Dom na Kultur. this isnt too abnormal in macedonia actually. there are no street numbers and although there are street names, no one knows em. so when you need to get somewhere, people use visual cues, even when directing taxis. i was looking for the Euro College. I was to meet my practikum partner and go to DAJA, an NGO for Roma women. We will be working there 2 hours per day, 2 days a week to get a feel for the working life of a non profit in macedonia. it should be interesting. Our counterpart, Dilbera, wasnt in when we finally found the place, but we delivered our letter and we expect to get phone calls for a time to meet in the near future.

i learned how to play bridge last night with my host family. mitat, arjad and ferxhan showed me the game. i say 'know how to play' in a very light way. i still have no clue how to count points and some of the other finer aspects of play, but it was fun. the bridge game grew out of a quick idea to play tic tac toe with Arife, one of the cousins who was sitting all alone as the boys crowded around the computer and the women talked over chai tea. you dont need language to play tic tac toe. suddenly everyone was into playing tic tac toe and it went on for a good half hour.

i also had an amusing milk/dairy situation arise. during training last week, Dr. Mimi said not to consume dairy that was unpasturized. ok. well, in the past week, i had not heard cow mooing. then, bam, there are obviously cows in one of the sheds surrounding the 'driveway' type area. that night, Razija plunks down a glass of fresh milk from a jar. im not sure how to proceed. i tell Arjad that peace corps told me not to drink milk that wasnt from a carton and he said thats fine.

then, there was yogurt. Razija put a container of yogurt on the table and i figured, ok its good, it came from a labeled plastic container that says YOGURT, but in Macedonian and Albanian and Language X. I eat some and Arjad looks at me funny. The yogurt, apparently, comes from the same cow the milk comes from. As in, the one in the shed out front. So, score one for heidi, total cultural miscommunication. (ps. the yogurt and cheese is amazing! i can taste the cow it came from, no lie.)

Sunday we had a meet and greet pony show to take all of us to each other's homestays. It was an 8 hour coffee, rakije (brandy/moonshine), Koka Kola, fanta, seltzer water, wine and yummies fest. Eight hours for 6 houses. The 6th house was our teacher's house, which is amazing. he is renting from an older couple and when they saw us, they came over with their homemade wine and chocolate goodies. My host mom made Byrek, it was fantastic. she makes all the bread for the house, she makes me ayvar n eggs for breakfast. Thankfully, the village is all hills and mountains, so im (believe it or not) losing weight throughout this adventure.

im going to find a way to post some pics and a video of folk dancing, so im going to cut this entry short. Hope you are all doing well in the US.

Ciao!

You don't have to eat the cow intestine/stomach

I will try hard to keep up to date with this, but you must understand, this week is blowing by. We arrived in vienna on Monday morning, had some free internetz in the airport, bummed for hours, flew into Skopje and since then, its been a nonstop type dealie.

We are in Kumanovo. I feel comfortable saying that much. We are at a hotel and I think we serve as 24/7 entertainment for the hotel staff at the moment. We learn pidgin macedonian and then we go off practicing on any native speaker we can find. We also drink coffee about 3-4 times daily. LLLLOVEEE IT! Morning breakfast is like germany breakfast- bread, cheeses (both spreadable and pieces), the best tasting cucumbers and tomatos in this world, and Coffee. Break at 10 includes expresso. Lunch doesnt include coffee, because after all the food they feed us, there really is no room for anything else, even a liquid. Afternoon break- more expresso. Dinner- SKOPSKO. Thats macedonian beer, btw. Its quite wonderful. Nightttime- coffee in town with PCTs (Peace COrps trainees). The peace corps loves these acronyms, so now you will too.

We have been slowly learning semi-useless macedonian words. I say semi useless because they really are until we get some other words and phrases to pair them with. I've been secretly listening to my mp3 files of both albanian and macedonian to try and pick up some useful phrases like: "What is ______ in Macedonian?" "What is that" "Where is____?" "How much?" etc. My roommates might think I am a bit weird mouthing things to myself at night, possibly even wierder if they heard slight breathy and terrible versions of the things i am trying to say.

I signed up for a site placement that will include learning both Albanian and Macedonian. We will find out tomorrow who gets them. 11 spots for 11-12 interested people. Looks good. Unfortunately, there are more breakdowns depending on sector- NGO development or teaching etc. Me and Rene are in the pool. My last count put the number of NGO rivals at 3, so including myself, we each would have a placement in the dual language sites. As for learning 2 languages at once, i say BRING IT ON. thats what im here for. thats what i do. and you know what, throw on some Turkish too.

I got the hep A and typhoid vaccines today so both of my arms feel like lead. We got the security and safety briefing today, well actually, the first of MANY, and Kosovo is a no go. meh. Albania is a go. AND! Important! We are actually restricted from traveling during the first 3 months after swearing in, which instantly struck me with fear since Jenny will be in Turkey in march, but if we swear in on the 12th of december, we will be clear on march 12. so that is still hopeful.

By the way, Macedonians do not function on time. They do not plan for specific dates. Things happen when they happen. Ima vreme-there is time.

I'm excited to get into the homestay. I think i am not nervous because Ive already had the homestay experience in germany and well, some of the AWKWAAAARD moments that happened there cannot be topped. for example, coming down to use the bathroom in the night and finding not only my host mother darting down the hallway naked, but her man friend naked in the bathroom as well. At least germans are not easily embarassed, thats all i can say. Chances are good that if i get this dual placement with an Albanian (muslim) family, nudity will not be a concern.

I'm going to leave it there for now, i dont want to spend more than 30 mins at the cafe, ill start writing entries ahead of time on my laptop and bring them with me.

Prijatno! (goodbye!)